Ongoing sporadic journal of the overeducated, and underemployed. The title derived from Coupland’s description of cubicle land; the corporate ghetto. Random photos and thoughts. Left the ghetto, never happier. This still a work in progress

28 February 2015

28.02.15
Glam the next day 
A little black dress, 
Stilettos,
And blackout shades’
That match 
Each other as 
We try
Not to burst a flame in the morning light
This place never closes
Holy Bloody Mary's
Sacred talk
Day-trippers stare 
Too much for
Day?
No
But 
You can’t hide beat

27 February 2015

27.02.15
Holy thinking 
Holy drinking
Holy Holy 
As we begin the Holy ritual
Once it begins
It cannot
Stop
Now it begins 
A
Kiss
A touch
No
Words
Laboured breathing
Moans 
Growls screams
The consecration 
Has begun
Holy Holy
Our will 
Be done


25 February 2015

                                                                        Monster

“How long have we known each other? “ I ask.
“Long enough” she answer’s pulling me close pressing against me urgently hands running over me.  Pushing my face into her thick blonde hair, that smells like lavender.
“Did we find what we were looking for?” I ask. I know her well enough know how she seduces this is not it. She does the standard deep kiss, and placing my hand on her breast.
“A drink?” she asks.
“Sure love, why not, “ I answer. OK it’s evening but, and Blair dresses still a little black dress and stiletto’s. She wears it well. We go to a favoured dive. I am guessing her husband, who is not found of us would never be found dead there or, any of her friends.
Nous gagné, ça s'arrose !” I shout in the car park. Bad French is one of the constants of our friendship; so we won let’s drink make sense
Blair answers “"C'est un bon coup!” basically you’re a good fuck.
I love this place Bukowski, or James Joyce would be at home here.
Today martini’s mine gin and wet, and Blair’s’ vodka dry. We talk about everything.
Second round arrives whatever it is it isn’t good. I ask, “Love what do you need from me?” I am asking now, because since I haven’t eaten the gin will have greater effect.
“You’ve always been there for me. I noticed you’re not packing any more. You know heat, your.45 auto?”
I start laughing and say Outta all the Gin joint’s in the world she walks into mine.”
“That’s not funny.” Blair said.
“This very Sam Spade the blonde dame in distress, and oddly enough second time today. I have been asked. “ I said.
  “I need help Brad’s mean.” Blair said pouting biting her lip, that look had gotten someone sent to the ER before.
  “I am not a hero, you know that. I am more Tyler Durden, than knight in shining armour ” I said.
“Did you help her? Is she younger than me? Prettier? More covers?” Blair insisted
You’re prettier, and younger, no I have a very unique skill set, what surprised me is that She knew, How?”
“Women know these things we can smell it I don’t   a hero; I need a Monster.” Blair said staring intently.
“I am not killing anyone for anyone today, and. make no mistake we love. We fancy you; we love you we don’t do that anymore.  I am semi-retired monster. I am not sure what Brad did but do you really want him dead?” I said.
“His name is Erik not dead just really scared. I told him I could call upon the dark rider of the apocalypse that is you if he was mean. Blair said hitting with me baby blue puppy eyes. The effect was calculated, because suddenly I’m 19 and the blonde in the front by the speakers that tall cool drink of water Ford Model is there, and I want her so bad.
“I am not that good, I am just your average Vampyre.” I said
You never said more covers?” Blair said twisting a strand of hair with her fingers.
“”You’re still the champion love, and still dead sexy, and a weapon’s grade body, and I am also sure you’re a little relived I said no. I am chuffed that you still think of me.”
“If someone hurts me?” Blair asked.
“Is that even a bloody question?!” I answer. Flashing on EMT’s taking someone from the club where I was a chucker.
The cop asks you “What happened here?
He tripped I imagine it’s rough by the stage; there’s witnesses, Suzy! Sheena! “I said.
Sheena and Suzie who drive into the city every Friday and Saturday night.
Matching outfits of mini and strategically ripped fishnets and purple hair. In unison they describe a mosh pit gone bad.
“They take Ronan past me he writhes and closes his eyes. Blair runs up throws herself around me. She in her glam girl look. looks at the cop  with her best southern sorority girl accent “My boyfriend called for help carried that boy out here to get some air.”
/the cops leave. I walk over so the booker, and manager can tell me what fuck-up I am. This is sure Blair can now walk through the club wearing a smile and heels and no one will say a word they will politely avert their eyes.
The women at the club hate her, “she’s so obvious, a blonde blue eyed model how is that punk? Why is she even here she’s not one of us!”
In the now she hands you a cigarette in the cat park, as you light it, and inhale you realize there’s coke on the filter so nice.
“”So love what now? “I ask
“What always hap pen’s now” Blair says motioning me to get in her jaguar. I climb in. Blair passes me the derringer loaded with a nice hit of Peruvian flake.
“Is she thinner than, me?” Blair demands
“No love you’re beyond compare. “I answer
“What about Amber, and her big plastic tit’s” Blair insists.
You were on honeymoon! How did you even know?” I answer. She always knew some weird precognition linked to my sex life.
“I am thirsty lets get some gin and a bed” Blair said.
“Why I love you woman,” I said. She pulls into the liquor store we walk in I look at champagne, she walks briskly ahead filling the basket, gin, tonic, limes by the check-out.
In the cat “Give us your panties I say in the car. A Blair smiles give a sexy smile and gives me black lacy I slip them in pocket.
We get to Hotel car park.  Blair hands the valet key puts the bar. Smiles supplies into a Gucci duffle.
We get quickly through the lobby to the front desk Blair check’s us in Mr. & Mrs., it might have been. Walking to the lift’s I casually fondle her. In the lift I slide my hand between her thighs. You know they have camera’s I say lifting her dress then pressing her against the back of the lift I brush her breasts her nipples are hard. The door opens
In front she fumbles the key card as I press against her. The door opens she throws the duffle.in. I pull her by her long blonde hair pin Blair to the wall. Strip her dress off her lacy bra she is standing in heels breathing hard.
“Lets get the ice I say taking her hand, she bends to retrieve her dress I pull her up.




 “Like this?” Blair asks blush coming to her cheeks. She walks to the desk grabs the ice bucket and takes my hand.
“Let’s go” Blair says confidently. We walk down the hall hand in hand. At the “ bikram yoga kick’s you’re body is amazing.” I say.   Wordlessly Blair drops to her knees put the ice bucket down while staring me in the eye pops an ice cube in her mouth runs another across her nipples. Blair takes me in her mouth. Staring me in the eye.  This not sex it is a sacrament, and I am being worshipped. I tap her and say “ room
Bitch” she tucks me into my jeans and picks up the ice bucket, and walks towards the room. I follow admiring her walk noticing she still does Dior turns.
Inside the room I grab her, kiss her roughly and throw her on the bed throw her on the bed. I strip, and fashion my t-shirt into  blindfold . Cover her eyes I take her scarf and tie her hands above her head to the headboard. I stroke her kiss, and nibble. She moans and writhes on the bed.
I spread her legs tasting licking, and nibbling her wet lips caressing the little man in the boat. She shivers and moans turn to screams. I get off the bed, and say “Not yet, Blair. “
“Please, I’ll be good” Blair implores. I get a drink a drink gin rocks amazingly well. I walk back to the bed. Stroking Blair’s hair. I say “I will release you now, you may arrive” untying her. She mounts me. Riding me screaming. then pulls herself off on all fours screaming take me!
 I take her from behind pulling her hair, ass her hips follow me perfectly. Blair arrives in guttural stream of profanity, as I arrive she presses her hip’s against me, then does almost a head stand
“I am ovulating, and I love when we make love.” Blair said in her semi headstand. I am sure what to say so; I make her a Tanqueray and tonic I hand it to her trying to process.
“”I told you I need a monster, and you’re my hero for being that quit worrying I know who you   are, and I love who we are. I don’t want to change a thing.“ Blair said, now lying in bed.
“Cool I said walking to the shower drink in hand. Blair followed
In the hair pulled up held in place by a pen, with hotel logo. Blair said, “If I wanted sweet, and caring. I would have been with a woman.”  We wash each other.  Then dry each other off she retrieve’s workout clothes and make-up from duffle. We dress no need to talk nor, is it uncomfortable.  Music from an electronica station in the background.
Blair break’s the silence I’ll take you    to your car, that was fan fucking tastic!”
“Blair your still the fuck of the millennium” I said.    We sing-a-long to Nirvana she drops leave me at the car park, with an amazing kiss, and we disappear into the real world just like that.


.



















24 February 2015

23.02.15

No name just a number 
They keep s haunting
Me
They haunting
Me
They keep haunting 
Me
To die without a name
They keep haunting
Me
Faces I can’t forget 
Keep me up all night
They keep haunting 
Me

24.02.15
You feel so familiar
I can’t see your face from here
I think I know you
Your humour
Your heart
Your voice
I can’t see your face from here
That bar where my friend danced?
Déjà vu when we speak
I can’t see your face from here
That dive with great martinis?
I can’t see your face from here
Have we awoken to each other?
I can’t see your face from here
An adventure?
You  see,I am not great with names
I can’t see your face from here



21 February 2015

17.02.15
fuck-off and die scum
you  don’t need a walking study in demonology
Please go to the Irish bastard
The one you asked me to teach a lesson,  with a .45 auto
You’re not
My type
As smart  you claim
Zip talent
And more baggage than a cruise ship

The Irish bastard 
Needs a meal ticket
I don’t
More issues than time
more daddy issues
than porn star
without the skills
you’ll never speak again
now that is 
the
nicest thing
you’ve ever done for anyone

19 February 2015

24.01.15 0n 19.02.15
Epitome of …. You referred to 
Me
I get it our
Your friends have cameras for eyes
It doesn’t play well 
Out
In the ‘burbs 
Talk
In your world that is everything 
In my world
We are
 Urban legends 
Cautionary tales
It’s 
Cool
We wear shades   
Because 
we’ve been underground so long 

a tired looking man 
in black leather
and blackout shades
having a cheap cocktail for breakfast
tghere is no way this finishes well for you
I have ran all scenarios
and in none of them
do you
survive

12 February 2015

12.02.15
another icy morning 
hot coffee dark music, and a blue dog
you leave without a kind word
I go to 
Icy regions 
Looking for a 
White horse
I call out 
She comes to me
Tap tap a little stab
Blood roses bloom in the snow

11 February 2015

                                                     Valentines Day

This is not your flat. It’s too posh and clean, and dreadfully lit by the sun like a terrarium. She is still asleep She’s actually attractive considering her make-up and tonnes of blonde hair are from the dungeon like club, where you met her in. Her tan skin contrasts your snow-white tan, you look at her body, and she’s a stunner.  Bits of last night come back industrial music loud trying to talk staring in to pale blue eyes the spontaneous combustion. Bloody snogging up against the wall her legs snaking around you the clock says 9:33, as she obviously has a job. She will be stirring soon- scarper time. Clothes scattered around her little black dress and stiletto’s. A shower would be nice, or another go, but that would mean conversation, beyond, fuck you’re sexy! On your part, and her you’re so cool! Still looking at her cute landing strip you need a cigarette more than, ever or perhaps a little taste of something stronger
You gather jean’s, Black T-shirt, black leather jacket de riguer for your tribe. Slip on your boots you don’t make noise, no one in regiment does. Thank fully there is a pack of player sailor cut cigarette ‘s in your jacket. You slip on blackout shades. Much better go down the stairs. You see the half bath and give yourself a quick prostie bath.
 Out the front door, you see your bike. You pick-up the paper in the lawn, and see the Date its Valentines Day Sunday. The manor is exploding in a riot of leaf blowers, and unreasonably bright sun lit cigarette bonnie roaring to life back to concrete canyon’s. You wonder what party’s are going on for Valentines Day.

09 February 2015

09.02.15
Playing as losing game
How many hoops can jump for you
Even in this drag, 
You see the alien 
I get the message
We don’t like your ilk
So tiring I can’t win
Only 
One reasonable thing to do
Change the game

07 February 2015

07.02.15
In my mood darker than the misty morning
Those eyes of blue
Speak, more than words ever
Will
words are very
Unnecessary we communicate by touch and sight
You take me from
Here
Next to
You
Such a nice place to be

06 February 2015

06.02.15
Nothing  goes so
Smashing with
a hot cup of coffee 
as 
how cold you are
Nothing makes my morning 
Like your
Insults
Nothing
Like 
Nothing here
nothing

05 February 2015

04.02.15
I am easy
I am who I said I was
If 
I wasn’t
Would
I claim it
Not sure 
What you saw
Or 
What you thought 
you might find
be here
or 
not
I am easy

04 February 2015

.04.02.15
Run to the Irish bastard
It would be comical
If it 
Weren’t so, bloody
Needy, and toxic
You tell me how smart you are
And repeat the same pattern into infinity
It stung for a moment
I healed like the Vampyre 
I told you I was


03 February 2015

03.02.15
I didn’t know
I was being 
careless, forgetful
but not 
cruel
well not this time

I didn’t know I could 
I didn’t know you cared
I thought we were cool
I didn’t know we 
Weren’t having fun
I guess
I didn’t know anything


02 February 2015

02,02.15  
The winter of our discontent 
Has returned  
Grey skies, blue moods
Cold Gin and tonic
Warm conversation