Ongoing sporadic journal of the overeducated, and underemployed. The title derived from Coupland’s description of cubicle land; the corporate ghetto. Random photos and thoughts. Left the ghetto, never happier. This still a work in progress

09 December 2023

 Kiss-9.12.23Mermaid remix


You close your eyes and fall into me ravenous embrace

Eyes closed complete

Surrender

You put my hand on your breast

I feel your nipple stiffen

Your scent fills my head the heat of  your body warms me being

your heart races under me bed

Nothing else matters

This kiss

My love

My world

This all we have

Kiss: when couples  kiss, gently entwining their tongues with one another, there is an increase in the production of oxytocin, which is a hormone associated with building bonds with someone special 2) a sign of affection, respect.


A  kiss


Kiss-9.12.23

You close your eyes and fall into my savage embrace

Eyes closed complete

Surrender

You put my hand on your breast

I feel your nipple stiffen

Your scent fills my head the heat of  your body warms my being

your heart races under my hand

Nothing else matters

This kiss

My love

My world

This all we have

Kiss: when couples  kiss, gently entwining their tongues with one another, there is an increase in the production of oxytocin, which is a hormone associated with building bonds with someone special 2) a sign of affection, respect.

 

A  kiss 

06 December 2023

 Raw-6.12.23

No pretence no shame


Like sushi raw delicious


I am ravenous


01 December 2023

 Broken angel-1.12.23

Found her on the sea bottom of   the desert

an hour out from Notre dame DE Afrique( or was it Joshua tree?)

She ultimately found life 

without any spiritual solace unendurable

She was looking for that ecstatic space

I knew the way

Next day under my coffee mug

I am killer

I am clown

My shots are final

I knew that when I laid down

My crown of thorns hanging 

From the sights of a C8 carbine 

Needing a fix

wander

to the desert

to meet

that 

Broken : having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order 2)Something/Someone that is so good in a particular context that it eclipses second place 3) wonky or conked out

broken angel

she would save my soul  tonight

if I had one




22 November 2023

 Thanksgiving my phone is ringing amplifying the ringing from a hangover that is, screaming in my head like a siren, 08:00 it must be mumsy.  “Hello love I answer.

an enthusiastic Happy Thanksgiving!”! rings through the phone I light a cigarette.  The coffee could use a shot of something.

“Are you coming around 3?” I have a guest, and don’t know what’s happening.”

“Please! Please!

“Ask him, there’s so much food. I have veuve clicquot champagne.” My bottle was killed last night. My refrigerator has mixers OJ, and cigarettes Misty might want food. 

“Hang on Mums. I put the phone on the table. walk to the bedroom my apartment is barely furnished bed, and stereo. Table a guitar in the corner.  Albums, books random art. I hear the shower. 

“Misty,  want to go to Thanksgiving, casual my ‘rents some of the exchange  students “

“All I  have is what I had on last night and that might have your teeth marks only dress and 4-inch pumps no hose. “ Misty answers.  Wrapping a towel around her waist. 

‘don’t need hose you’re tan and waxed”

“We just met.”

“You're OK it’s casual. “I  am wearing jeans and a T, you’re pretty in anything in answer. We locked eyes across the room last night. Whilst a band cranked 3 chords at high volume. 

“Do you have a hair dryer?

In the cupboard.”

“Do you have a girlfriend?”

“No, why?” 

“There’s tampons in here.”

“For visitors’

“How many have there been? Don’t answer. None of my business. “ Misty stammers.

“Why so serious ?’ I ask.

“I am overthinking?” she asks.

Yes, if it's a  bother we won’t go”.

No, I want to”.

I’ll tell Mumsy” remembering I left herb on hold.

“Did you forget? 

“I am coming and so is Misty.

Love you cheers”.

Drive to the ‘burbs

Mumsy at the door.

“Was she waiting?” Misty asks. Relax 

The dog barks when he hears my car.” I answer.  I walk around and open her door Mumsy waving us in. There introduction table set we are seated across from each other.

Mumsy says say the blessing. Misty gives me a wink. Leans forward hands clasped in prayer ample cleavage and blonde hair spilling onto the table.

I begin, “Lord we thank you for the bounty on the table. Misty giggles, as does Mumsy. I excuse, myself for a cigarette as my father carves. Mumsy follows. 

“I can’t believe you just said that laughing. 

You can’t be mad you're still laughing.

She hugs me and goes back inside where Misty has charmed my father. Sayed is telling a chemistry joke. I just smile politely Misty gives a laugh.


18 November 2023

 The sky was Weeping -13.11.23.

Because

I can’t

But you know that

You were there when

I was born (screaming and bloody)

after died (screaming bloody  gun smoke heavy in the air))

everywhere betwixt

Weeping my way

My stiletto opens

Sorry dude I meant nothing a

Move on

Weeping: to express grief, sorrow, or any overpowering emotion by shedding tears; shed tears; cry


I can’t yet  

weeping


08 November 2023

 All-04.11.23

those

Years

All

those

Loves

All

those

moments

all

our

love

Fit in a small urn?

A million  mad thoughts

talking

to clouds

Talking

to butterflies

driving you to the house

Because

That's

used to refer to the whole quantity or extent of a particular group or thing 2) whole of one's energy or interest, love

 all 

there is


07 November 2023

 Gonna-07.11.23

need a  fix hollow

never gonna know you but

 still gonna love you


05 November 2023

 Shadow puppets-03.11.23

Surging on my rush

Songs for the deaf

Crown of thorns

Ground control calling(let it go  to voice mail)

swimming in the clouds

Pale blue skies( the colour of St Jill)

angels rage and scream

mutiny in  heaven roars

angels fall like rain

Free -take one

Waking

pistol in my hand

Shadow puppets are figures that are placed between a screen and a light. Using your hands and fingers

see your shadow (we are all shadow puppets  at 03:00)

Click the safeties on

Jackson Pollack’s daughters

Good time girl

Blue Bunny is prophecy

Voices visions

writing my disease


 Pink Spiders and coffee-05.11.23

pink spider breakfast

photo appears on my phone

ride like you stole it


30 October 2023

 Diseased-30.10.23

I cured the disease

I am  keeping the symptoms

perfecting disease


22 October 2023

 Jonsing-22.10

ecstasy and pain

this  condition called  romance

jonsing for a fix

21 October 2023

 betwixt-13.07.23

secret rites of Heart soul

 composed of love pain

wrought from agony and ecstasy

higher knowledge

in the realms of spirituality and mysticism

flying 

betwixt worlds 

betwixt 

pink spiders 

the secret lives of   butterflies

betwixt

coffee and smoke

talking with clouds

betwixt

Dreaming on you

Betwixt: between two people or things

Missing you





 Whispers-15.10.23

wispy clouds blue sky

she is   whispering to me

in steely-blue sky


 Sunrise-20.10.23

Transitive  sunrise

eyes like jewels, skin soft warm

us lost in a kiss


celebration-14.10.23 

Reflections from the hall of mirrors

pavement morphing

“white sandy beach

Crescent

moons Shadows

mermaid 

Dancing on the sands

to unseen guitarist 

a heat break tango

we dance

celebrating  eclipse

celebrating darkness (moon covering sun)


celebrating 

each other

Celebration :a party or a gathering of people for reasons that are usually happy where the people interact and have a good time

celebration


08 October 2023

 Ravenous=08.10.23

How long have

I slept

Remembering an angel cries

Paint on her feet

Torn wings

Head full 0f Pollack

Passion 
world class pussy

Burning

long ago

Only polaroid from a tryst

Stolen moments

waking

ravenous

Vampyric  hunger

Muse  nervous  

MUST  feed

Ravenous: extremely hungry. 2)starved not necessarily for food. 3) bind desire, that must be satisfied

ravenous


01 October 2023

light.01.10.23

she gives off  bright light

a lovely terrible light

enduring  burning


22 September 2023

 01.11.15-veil(later)

neon beer lights

bored bartender

she

smiles

the veil

thin

tonight

living

dead

one

not

drinking

alone

shades follow

caressing

comforting

chatting

veil fiction

veil non-existent

never sure

what side of the veil 

I belong

Veil: to cover, provide, obscure, or conceal with or as if with a veil 2) to hide or cover something so that you cannot see it clearly or understand it: Thick fog 3) the thin layer betwixt worlds 

Pulling away the veil


20 September 2023

 Love story-17.08.21(later)

Coming

In

Tony Tony Lima

Coming

in

Hot

Coming

In

Fast

ATC: Air Traffic Control

ATC

Never a flight plan

Runway: 1) strip of smooth ground along which aircraft take off and land 2) narrow stage that models walk along in a fashion show 3) pubic area groomed

Runway foamed

Runway clear and open

ETA

NOW

or never

This

Is

16 September 2023

 Betwixt worlds-16.09.23

here in betwixt worlds

we Existential lovers

love forevermore


 Shades of love-15.09.23

My friend's 3rd eye sees you

shade

I feel you

My loveliest of shades

You send messages

strange and deeply mysterious

my love 

Shades: darkness and coolness caused by shelter from direct sunlight.2))the spirit or ghost of a dead person, residing in the underworld


my shade


13 September 2023

 Tears-13.09.23

you’re stripping love

down to  pain scars,  and raw want

such beautiful tears


 Ride 13.09.23

Our love our sex

bizarre and temporary

so enjoy the ride

10 September 2023

 Jump in10.09.23

Alice

White rabbit morphing to blue bunny( they are one in the same)

Buckle up Alice

Next stop

down the rabbit hole

From there

Further

Where

Cosmic poets

tell stories in the clouds


Where 

fallen angels swim

Beyond your  good and evil( so quaint)

Where cowgirls dance in the sand

Mermaids hitchhiked in 

Jump: 1)) move suddenly and quickly 2) Slang: engage in an act of sexual intercourse  3)to take possession of something

1

2

3

1, 2, 3 , 4!

JUMP


07 September 2023

 Shadow puppets-.07.09.23

Surging on my rush(magik  in my blood)

Songs for the deaf

Ground control calling(straight to  voice mail)

swimming in the clouds

Pale blue skies(colour of St Jill)

Crown of thorns

Free -take one

’74 Peugeot diesel backfires

Waking- but where were the pink  spiders?

pistol in  hand(reflex)

see your shadow (we are all shadow puppets  at 03:00)

Click the safeties on

Jackson Pollack’s daughters (abstract rendezvous ) 

Good time girl( sleeping I listen to your heartbeat)

Blue Bunny is a prophet  sensual surrealist

Voices visions(norms don’t see and hear)

Flashes of the final destination



Shadow puppets are figures that are placed between a wall and a light. Using your hands and fingers 2) Shadow puppets never reveal their true identity and hide  


I’ll give you shadow puppets


03 September 2023

 Time-03.09.23

The trick of time

How much time ?

Today that’s it

The past  gone

Future a rumour

Only a moment at a time

Live the walking dead surround

Sleep walking through

time

This

Neither true

Nor

Is it false (discuss  Genets’s Caligula for extra credit)

Time  it’s Kelly Moynihan birthday:

 Time : 1.the  nonspatial continuum in which events occur. 2) infinite progression measured in units

Time


01 September 2023

 Feeling it-01.09.23

concubine/sweet child/warrior/ mythological creature

 feel

Like

me soul  woman/child/insatiable lover

always make me

feel

like meself,

ya feel me?

Cooking  up medicine(shaman cures  flame and magic)

For

Emotion  sickness(burning inside cool on the outside(stiff upper lip)

Feel: be aware of (a person by touching or being touched  2)I understand you 3) sensation or emotion

feel



29 August 2023

 Abstract-29.08.23

Mermaid pussy

In Octopus’ Garden

Speaking in tongues

Growling

Screaming

Moaning

Flying high

Flying low

Pink spider’s

Red bunnies

Fallen angels

Salty kisses

Surfing in Cornwall

Abstract:1. : a summary of points presented in skeletal form: something that summarizes or concentrates the essentials of a larger thing  2)When someone thinks out of the box 3) art that uses visual language of shape, form, colour, and line to create a work of art without being bound to concrete images of the world

abstract


21 August 2023

 Wispy-21.08.23

wispy clouds blue skies

sussing you're not talking

look for me  I'm here


20 August 2023

Cure-19.08.23

careful this is a murder scene

emotion sickness

carnal carnival

This  conversation is classified

screaming in tongues

Clawing 

Growling

Addiction 

Transubstantiation

the cure for pain

Cure :relieve of the symptoms of a disease or condition.

"he was cured of the disease" 2)Acronym of 'cherishee

 

  

Sunday -20.08.23

love mermaids gone wild

double stuff rendezvous date

. vampyric lust love

10 August 2023


Always running yellow light-10.08.23


Forget us our trespasses

As we  forget those who trespass against us

Need

to be here

Now

Off

Spinning around

Mercedes convertible

Tri  Delt  sticker

Couldn’t stay together

Couldn’t  be apart

Strung out on us

Down shift pop the clutch

Yellow light: , you should stop, if you can do so safely. If you can't stop, proceed with caution.

Run the  yellow light


 

05 August 2023

 My kind-05.08.23

‘paranoia, angels, true love(as seen on TV)

Feral  mermaid swims away

Deadly love letters(yellowing (like hepatitis)

Vinyl plays

Cowgirl rode me( wearing me crown of thorns)

Let it happen

Light house (everything looks better by moonlight)

I see.

into the dark

running down

This was nothing

Mona Lisa thighs

Yoga limber

growls

Screams

Long red fingernails   claw my back

Little deaths spontaneous  combustion

Kind: quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.2) People or things having similar characteristics.

She’s my kind


31 July 2023

 In queue -31.07.23

my dreams of swimming

mi muñeca sirena

warrior and child


30 July 2023

 trill-30.07.23

Trilling noises

beside me

coffee bar

young woman

smokey eyes locking with mine

seductive smile

kiss

Trilling noise

Deeper louder

Trill: Trill :combination of the words "true" and "real”.2)a quavering or vibratory sound

trill


 Floating-31.07.23

ride  wild banana

swimming through the  galaxies

mindless loud laughter

 

26 July 2023

 Palm Springs-25 0:245

pretty bunnies  dance

bunnies and mermaids at  play

a palm springs weekend


 lost prayer-26.07.23

walking  alone shades hide my face

me  glorious sins  writ in fire  exploding across night sky 

fires of love, burn in me  soul

walk  alone shades hide my face

me sins  writ in fire

fires of love, burn in me  soul

Scarred  covered  mask is made of stone

I'

seize  angel by  her horns, spread  wings

Until I'm inside

evangelisation

All me words are written

in  a lost prayer



22 July 2023

 Consciously Unconscious -22.07.23

Is a place not a repository of energy

Unconscious :Is a place not a repository of energy and childhood traumas

A dimension

A place you ascend

Or descend

Blue bunny knows the way

Reductionist models too limiting

Unlimited capacity

For understanding

Is an unlimited

So must be

Capacity

Joy

blue bunny is calling’s

St Sirène has lit a lighthouse with


21 July 2023

 Catch if the day-21.07.23

look the horizon

mermaid  falling  from grace

demon  catching her

20 July 2023

Double stuff-19.07.23

love mermaids gone wild

double stuff rendezvous date

. vampyric lust love 

 waking-20.07.23

dowsed in skag

 regret and  dreams 

obsessed  

pink spider(sweet venom)

morning

tastes

of

lost love

past lives

unforgiven mistakes

transgressions.

Lighting a candle


Going down

Underground

6 feet

beneath


16 July 2023

 Breathe-14.07.23

take off your panties

your pussy needs to breathe too

you can talk to me

 transfiguration-16.07.23

she dancing 

to /for me

fertility rites

she connecting to me

pulling

in her web

why

don’t

know why

losing

into space?

Or  just beyond

she spins

Morning light

Illuminating her dance

epiphany

Transfiguration:  a complete change of form or appearance into a more beautiful or spiritual state.

She  is Transfiguration

self

no, I don’t know why

no, I don’t know how

Levitating  with she


13 July 2023

 On St Jill’s day-13.07.23

he rituals

The candle

the spoon

I must be

sanctified

suffer it

leper messiah

self-sacrifice

Stigmata growing

Redeemed in blood carrying sacred truths and poppies)

pleasure

Into

a higher place

love

pleasure

one

In the

Flame

Flame consumes self.

St Jill: patroness of OD’s, and runaways.


St Jill’s day




 Fire and desire 11.07.11

Yes, I am the match

 

I lit up her snatch on fire

 

the fire of desire

 Breathe-12.07.23

take off your panties

your pussy needs to breathe too

you can talk to me

 Je T’adore-13.07.23

look out !the saints are Marching

taking what I  need

Hitting the streets

a mermaid

painting abstracts

pink spider

wrapped my sheets

better gather your favourite  sins

hit the road

we won’t last

grab it fast

sky is falling

over you

cockatoo

mocking you

lover

walking out

Of your

Door

Je t’adore


09 July 2023

 Levitate-09.07.23

Eye contact

primal contract drinks

music

matching pain

chemistry

Passion

Moans

Growls falling into

Bed

Into

Like

She smiles

Hands me  my earring a piece of ear attached

scundered giggling

 

Passion _human flesh

levitate: 1)rise or cause to rise and hover in the air, especially by means of supernatural or magical power. 2)3) float in air  in defiance of gravity 3) To achieve synchronized bliss with your partner 

Levitating-priceless

08 July 2023

 Foot note-08.07.23

Foot note-08.07.23

don't get my writing

my writing doesn't get you and

it  doesn't care either

 Parfum-05.07.23

Parfum-05.07.23

Remember  

Us(? Mickey and Mallory/Sid and Nancy )

Surfing in Sweden

tic tac toe 

Strange beauty

In the queue when

A bottle of perfume in hand

Falls to the  ground(it shattered an abstract of my soul/heart)

It hits me like a bullet( I know the feeling too well)you don’t need it anymore or anything else

For evermore

stagger outside //(blinding light/heat)

Talking to clouds and Angels

I can still smell your human perfume

04 July 2023


Fly-04.07.23

looking in the clouds

the beach  where we flew kites

we  still fly in clouds

 Good morning -04.07.23

my kitty is wet

and my nipples are so hard

awe think she likes me

03 July 2023

 


Stars and coffee-03.07.23

cruising  milky way

swimming through stars looking for

entrance to  her dreams


 Consent-02.07.23

must crash

Couldn’t turn off my brain

No sleep

Talking as she

undresses

Lays down

Closes he eyes

Now

further away than

My home

Can I intrude

slip

Into

Her dreams

Do

Consent: permission for something to happen2)giving someone permission

I need consent

To take

Her swimming

in

Andromeda galaxy

Show her

Messages in clouds

How to chat with

Angels and pups( one in the same)

Become centaur and carry her to the beach

Get high with Jimi, and Amy at EGS8p7

Do I need/ have?

Consent


02 July 2023

 Mermaid haiku-02.07.23

I saw her swimming  

asked mermaid to write haiku

waiting on the beach

01 July 2023

  

Myth-30.06.23

walking  on water

Mermaid apartment complex

dreaming girls and myths

Sussing-01.07.23.

sussing you  out   muse

high on my  muse and a dime

writing my disease

 

24 June 2023

 Dreams-16.06.23

she lays down with me

last night dreamed someone loved me

woke up on my own


 Spoons

Svetlana calls, “Is me Svetlana Popachex “in an accent that says must get squirrel and moose. Picturing her last time, we were together a little black dress smoldering bedroom eyes long leg. It’s been a while.

“Cheers, love. I answer. She’s usually to the point not sure if it’s the language barrier or her personality. On que. 

 

“I need favour, are you alone?” Svetlana asks.

“” Just me and Bowie (my pup) “

“Bowie is girl?” She asks. 

“Bowie is my dog remember; he stole your pump.”

Svetlana giggles and says. I need favour.

“How can help?” I answer.

“Can stay tonight.”

“OK” I answer my night just got better pictures of her stepping out of her dress flash across my mind. 

“Yes” I answer. tonight’s looking up.

I give her the full address. Whilst cleaning. The fridge has mixers and not much else I can order when she arrives.  Put a pillow and sheet on sofa her tone didn’t say, seduction, but more I need a friend. Still the image of her fills my head. I wonder why me; we had a moment nothing serious. Running from or towards?

Bowie barks   I open the door Svetlana cut-offs, halter, and sunglasses a ruck on wheels and a hobo handbag a pouty expression She bites her lip and comes for a hug.  I usher her in Bowie watches us.

” Are you hungry?  I can order whatever you fancy, please sit relax. “I said gesturing towards the sofa.

She sits closes her eyes as she sits on the sofa, and say’s “Ďakujem láska “in her raspy voice.  I remember. She fancied Miles Davis. I put on  “Ascenseur pour l’échafaud” pour her a glass of white Bordeaux.  She takes the glass with a smile twirling a strand of long blonde hair. I don’t ask anything. I don’t need to know. If someone follows, I will sort it then, now she needs peace.  We chat about nothing she looks through my vinyl and selects” Pretty Reckless Death by Rock N Roll” I’ll play as I am queuing album up, she puts the cover next to her face. And said “Ako ja.” 

“Yes, I see Taylor in you” say hoping that’s what she meant. She’s smiling in a way haven’t seen since she came in. n One glass of wine turns into an empty bottle singing along to Pretty Reckless. She looks tired.

 I show her to the bedroom. today was wash so clean sheets clean towels., and robe.  She sits on the bed and kicks off wedge espadrilles and lays back.

“If you need anything I’ll be on the sofa “

“No, she pats bed. ”OK We make spoons?” She says for the first time there’s need in her voice. 

“I can do that.” I answer there a lot worse things in life than, laying next to a beautiful woman. I might take a cold shower first. She points at the bathroom opens her ruck extracts some things   walks to bathroom. I let Bowie out and walk back she’s coming out of the bathroom she’s wearing panties. Looking every bit 30 something Taylor. I lay in bed she lays down. She scoots next to me. I put my arms around her she presses against me. He warmth feels good. This lasts a while in dark quiet. Laying the smell of her and the soft feel of her skin. She spins around.  

“Enough spoon!  rob ma ako kurvu!” 

I have no idea what she’s   saying but the panties are gone, and she put my hand on her breast and working her way down me moans turn to growls turns to screams until we’re exhausted sweaty and crash.

” Kava! wakes me Svetlana is holding a cup of coffee. “The morning light gives her an ethereal glow like a nude angel. Strange waking up to someone other than Bowie. Would you like to like to shower?”

“Ja” she takes me by the hand. Leading me adjusting the water we wash each slowly with tenderness we towel. Each other dry we kiss gently. I watch her dress apply make-up. Silence save for Coltrane’s A Love Supreme. The silence isn’t uncomfortable. She packs her ruck I offer to carry to her car; she waves me off at the door. She pauses and says” One day I tell you everything thank you.”

“No, I take you as you come Bowie and I keep secrets. Come by anytime.  Bowie and really like you I say. The door closes I take my coffee to the sofa and start writing.

I like you.









 Alfie-22.06.23

what are we doing?

what do we call this thing  love?

how about Alfie?


 silent voyeur-24.06-23

the arched hallway

Graceful stretches

graceful poses

leg hold

Pointe

voyeur

my lover in an unguarded moment

last night

Me shoulders barre

Years  of practice

By  the Danube

Body’s strong

beauty

Passion

Voyeur: a person who gains pleasure from watching others 2  50 metres away calling  coordinates for mop up

silent   voyeur ( lest I break the spell)




16 June 2023

 heretics  in heaven-14.06.23

Jesus wept

A joy bang would sorted  it

Heretics  R us

derelict

vagabonds

Staggering

Bound to

Us

Bound


fly

flying

High

Let’s get higher

desire

Your fire long legs pulling me

Into the inferno

Flames consume

Us

Clouds assume

us

Heretics : person who differs in opinion from established religious dogma  nonconformistmist


heretics in heaven



 Waiting room-16.06.23

hear that voice,

rifles on rock n roll

If it moves it's a legal target if it doesn't it's a legal target

God has mercy we don’t

fuck its mine

would rather be there

Than missing you

That hollow ache

That nothing can fill( have tried )

Waiting room for heaven

Is

Hell

DMZ’s

ER’s

Shooting galleries

Crackteria

Waiting Room is the virtual limbo of seemingly never-ending muzak you are often sent to when at a doctor’s office or Government agency.

Miss you girl( whispered prayer)


Waiting room

spinning vinyl 

scotch rocks 

hollow

10 June 2023

 My kind 10.06.23

angels, true love obsession

Passion always in fashion

Cowgirl rode me in reverse

A mermaid swim away

Deadly love letters

Eyes lock

Recognise her

A primal contract

Eyes lock

Recognise her(in clouds?)

A primal contract

Primal contact

devouring  each other

Come

where

Vinyl plays

Let it happen!

Light house?

I see

into the dark

running down

This was nothing

This is EVERYTHING

Mona Lisa thighs

yoga limber

growls

Screams

Long red fingernails   claw my back

Heaven arriving

Little deaths

Sexy , Seraphim

Celestial pleasure

Kind: quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. People or things having similar characteristics.

She’s my kind


03 June 2023

 Stigmata-03.06.23

lover in me bed

gun to me heart

falling apart


becoming a part of

share me disease

you’ll soon be perfect

just like me

stigmata can’t be covered with filers, Botox, or yoga

high street we should meet

Ravenous heat

So fucking sweet(life force)

Sweet fucking(life force)

Stigmata : 1)bodily marks, scars, or pains corresponding to those of the crucified Jesus 2) a mark of disgrace 


stigmata


01 June 2023

 Shelter-31.05.23

stand behind me

I’ll take the hit

stop fists

stop knives

Stop bullets

Stop lives

Can’t kill

What’s dead

you’re so small in  my arms

Wet hair

Pumps in hand

So tiny

Baby baby

Though you have your own

Eyes moist, hazel , vulnerable

you’re  strong

Lean on me

I am here

Catch you if you fall

Have your 6

Shelter: a place giving temporary protection from bad weather or danger

I am shelter


29 May 2023

 Breakfast-29.05.23

dark hair

making breakfast

smell of coffee

towel

that body lit the night

Like a light tower

I pull

Towel

she to me

Breakfast?

Yes you are

Breakfast: a meal eaten in the morning 2)her


Breakfast

Served hot




27 May 2023

 27.05.23-Swan Queen

lovely

 graceful

knows

Vampyre

shows him

the land

east of the sun,

west of the moon

Masquerading

as a lady

the grace 

and beauty

won’t be obscured

regal graceful

Swan Queen


26 May 2023

                                                   Cloud spotting-26.05.23

her cloud messages

she’s just beyond me vision

she’s beyond me reach

25 May 2023

 Nostalgia-25.05

just remembering

Desperation sporadic

smalls weapon fire

23 May 2023

 Texting Salome-23.05.23

Waking

baking

lost me soul

too cheap

too soon

my hunger

my need

my greed

will feed

desperation need

My fucking  god!

heroin(e)

Need a fix

John the Baptist lost his head over a dancer

ravenous 

jonsing

texting

Salome


19 May 2023

                                                         Treading water-19.05.23

She swims towards me

 

the Bohemian mermaid

just treading water

17 May 2023

 Vacariously-16.05.23

too young too pretty

 she's living vicariously

Numbers can wait  live


14 May 2023

 Tonight=-13.05.23

that little black dress

long legs high skirt stilettos 

seduction and lust


 messy-14.05.23

Seductive

thighs

skin on skin

riding this inti the night

This will be messy 

This will be loud

This will not be boring

Saint Sirène

Bless this wreck

Clean up on aisle 13

Lovers and passion a

all over the floor 

Messy:1)untidy or dirty. 2)confused and difficult to deal with 3) out of control

messy


12 May 2023

 Smoking-12.05.23

early morning

ritual

smoking

sacred herb

passed back and forth

Her lips to mine

My lips to hers

Casually intimate

Intimately casual

She’s smoking

Our playlist kaleidoscopic

music

Chatting

Nothing too serious yet

Makes us keeps us delirious

Whatever keeps us high

 Our cocktail-dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin(guerrière gazes contemplates a 

Tryst filling her with shame and excitement)

Smoking : smoking is the practice of burning a substance and ingesting the resulting smoke. 2) a person that is so hot (sexy) that smoke emits from them figuratively

Just 

smoking


09 May 2023

 Success?-09.05.23

Who sold you this goal


all-American success?


For what Trade your art


08 May 2023

 Déjà vu-98.05.23

sussing

we have done  this

we know

How it ends

Messy and loud

Like our love

Déjà vu

the feeling when something has happened before when in fact is a brand-new experience to the person 2)the same beautiful accident over and over


Déjà vu



 Swim-08.05.23

my muse and  mentor

the American haiku

swimming in the deep


07 May 2023

 


Pink-07.05.23

Pink spider

Coming

On strong

Coming on

Long Slavic legs


                                                 Stormy  night(lightening thunder small deaths)


Diving into her

Web

Into her bed

Realising

I am dinner

tonight

Laughing  shaking her head

Closer to her bed

And soft as a breeze  and

Her tongue flickers

Her legs around me 

Pulling in

Out the black 

into 

Pink 1)  colour intermediate between red and white, as of coral or salmon 2) innocence and sexual purity in a young woman 3) Feminine, Flirtatious, and Sexual


pink


06 May 2023

 27.07.16-beauty

her 

beauty

complete

devastating 

irresistible

my Botticelli

come 

visit

stay 

shade

you’re

so 

light and 

beautiful

I’ll

Carry you

Eternally 


At once

Annihilated

Shielded

By  

You

Shade:  darkness and coolness caused by shelter from direct sunlight. 2)  'acting in a casual or disrespectful manner 3) person’s soul or spirit can remain visible 

My shade


  Her type-03.05.23

she's typing Starkers

sexily  crunching numbers

landing strip calls me


 Desire 04.05.23

waking

SCREAMING

gutted

Too hot to sleep

Too cold to dream

sussed

Thought

you knew

one way to fight

one way to love

to the death mine!


Feeding on your

beauty

Running for

My fix

Cook it up

Tie it up

Bang bit up


desire: a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen 2)A woman who's pretty, funky, and fun.

desire



 Feral-05.05.23

catch that scent feral

her legs just took me there now

I am going in


30 April 2023

 CV-30.04.23

Pieces

our

Sex

Fit

Passionately

Lovingly

Obscene bonfire

Your body fills

Me mind

your fire

Lights me  soul aflame

Speaking in tongues

interpreting  erotic dreams

The organization of flying machines 

An odd attraction-we can’t ignore

A fleet of angels  with resplendent green silk wings

CV: Curriculum Vitae

This my CV

Applying for

The position(s)

Of your lover


29 April 2023

 Dance-29.04.

dance with me my muse 

Let me get lost in beauty 

want to drown in you


28 April 2023

 clouds-28.04.

We are always 

in

Aimless melancholy

that take root

a person 

understand

guarantees of American dreams 

marriage, children, job in a large building

aren’t protection

from desolation

not catastrophic loss

strange little ache that feels like a hollow

where your souls should be

No amount

of soul cycle

probiotics

Himalayan salt

 sleep surgery 

psychoanalysis

can fully alleviate that fog of sadness

existential angst

lives

transient absurd

death mandatory and permanent —but another part feels gradual

a slow drip of little and big losses that will define

we are always 

leaving 

losing

being left

er are always 

looking for 

meaning in clouds



27 April 2023

  Star map-28.04.23

messages  in clouds

all you left me was  alone (love is always an amputation)

fire dancer to me right

almost out of sight

Off these days

my fist collides

with

mirrors

With

Faces

a lone

a butterfly  lands

points at the cloud

fireworks from heaven

Music and art

Fill the space betwixt us

Star map :a  physical map was commonly sold in  LA to help link tourists find celebrity homes 2)a celestial map of the night sky


Need a map to 

you (this galaxy  brings me down, down

need a star map


26 April 2023

 Barbie-26.04.23

it's a given that

you party for a living

barbie   can you love


22 April 2023

Our Lady-22.04.23

My paintings, poems  made her unhappy

Rather lead her to acknowledge

Existence  of unhappiness

That had  always

Been inside her (like an altar)

mystery and tragedy of her own sex

her desire

mirror in that flat

 ornate and gilded 

it was here she judged herself 

and examined

sorrows that were 

begged

borrowed

and stolen

Our Lady

of sorrows

our Lady 

of petite mort

Our Lady often refers to: Mary, mother of Jesus. Veneration of Mary in the Catholic Church.

Our Lady



 

13 April 2023

 Nostalgia-13.04.23

nostalgia for what  will never be

spellbound sound of a heartbeat

lost

&

found

drowning in  sound

Heartsick

nostalgia fix

need NyQuil-quick!

Cure the disease

Keep the symptoms

Nostalgia: A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.

Nostalgia

























Nyquil-quick

Still nostalgia


 Nostalgia-13.04.23

nostalgia for what  will never be

spellbound sound of a heartbeat

lost

&

found

drowning in  sound

Heartsick

nostalgia fix

need NyQuil-quick!

Cure the disease

Keep the symptoms

Nostalgia: A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.

Nostalgia


09 April 2023

 Road rage-30.04.23

Dali holds

gun

to me head

FIRE

I dissolve

lightly salted popcorn

hurricane in a glass

blues and jazz

art

all we have is now

nothing else exists

howling 

car park

Angel in a cage 

emotional rescue

heaven in heels

demon flying high mainlining (art, music, joy & sex)

Raging: an intense and sometimes violent kind of anger. 2)A party, particularly a large, wild party

on the road

raging




07 April 2023

 


Punk Magick on  Good Friday-07.04.23

rituals of it are magick

I mean  mass is a magick ritual 

it’s a trans-substantiation!

I mean, the stations of the cross, the crown of thorns, getting whipped

the wild girlfriend

crying nailed to a cross

by  fascist

moment of doubt & pain

My God, my God why have you forsaken me!

Passion!

its punks  and magick


05 April 2023

 Mean-05.04.23

Can’t look me in the eye

Now

Why did it mean?

So much ?

Too mean so little

To you?

Why are you so mean?

I mean

Sussing you

You mean 

And we don’t mean anything to you


Mean: To be inconsiderate and selfish · 2. adj. So hot, sexy and/or tight it defies description and boggles the mind. · 3. n. The sum of a series of numbers 4) to matter

 

 





 Pink-05.04.23

power of pink thong

taking me high lifting me

dropping me to knees



04 April 2023

 Palm Sunday-02.04.23

Flying monkeys and cocktails

Post cards from pink spiders

The scent of perfume weed

Raw sex (musky)

tapping out tablets and powders(cooking

filling an empty place

klicks from the muddy water( Jesus turning into hurricane punch)

Hide your love

it can 

and 

will be

used against 

YOU

There is

 ONLY NOW

 Nothing else exists 

Feral pussy &  blues 

On 

Palm Sunday:  It thus marks the beginning of Holy Week, the final week of Lent.

Palm Sunday



30 March 2023

Dessert-30.03.23

long hair and high dress

she's high as her dress and  heels

sweet and salty taste

 

 Dress code 30.03.23

casual sex yes

no shirt no shoes no worries

blue jeans are  allowed


26 March 2023

 09:30 car park ER  25.03.23

Run free

Holding you

A gasp warmth leaving

Me singing a French lullaby

Taken

Companion

Trusted friend

Comrade in arms outside unreasonably sunny

For so long ago

I believed in Angels

Sun  hurting

My eyes

Slap on shades

Going Underground

Nothing registers

Just

Numb: the feeling of feeling no feeling.

numb


21 March 2023

 self-immolation 

Soul ascending

pillar fire

just watching

How brightly she burns

That she burns

self-immolation broadly refers to acts of altruistic suicide, otherwise the giving up of one's body in an act of sacrifice.

 self-immolate

for art 

 self-immolate

for love


17 March 2023

 Vapid-17.03.23

find her in the morning after

dreams of swimming in the Milky Way

I want to pour her over her

Like the sun kisses flowers

Watch her

Open in full

bloom

She  begs off

vapid She insists

fought too long

Not to see the feint within the feint

Held her too close not to know the truth

She seeks divinity

To  follow her

You must be clean

You must repent

Not sure what she meant

Vapid: offering nothing stimulating challenging. 2)Derogatory term for a female, implying superficiality, materialism, vanity, and a hollow

Says she’s vapid



16 March 2023

 


Swamp-16.03.23

My nipples could cut glass

My panties a swamp

to breaking my vows

No need to be saved

Vows shattered on the ground

This won’t break me

Swamp: 1)wetlands 2) excessive amount of something 3) overwhelming

 dive into the swamp

to emerge sanctified 


  Idiosyncratic hook up-20.01.22-later

Any man/ distraction

Would have filled the void I could have been anyone with the 

possible exception someone she cared about

I’m easy 

Drawn to fire

moth

fated to burn

be well

be sexy

be pretty

be happy

wait an hour before swimming after meals

cross on green not in betwixt

2,5,6,7 all good cretins go to heaven-Joey Ramone

Idiosyncratic: Idiosyncrasy is an unusual feature of a person. 2) an odd habit


just

a

Idiosyncratic hook up



15 March 2023

 She was Nico? -19.11.21-later

Her canvas was herself 

anything/ anyone

So very lonely

Intimidating  

too many 

siren’s call

I was deep underground

 cocktail of cacogenics,  coffee, and controlled substances

Lost in a dream (dreams will come)

I heard her a voice like single malt scotch)

This morning 

Driving blind

Desperately

Wantonly

No hello

No goodbye 

Just NOW

She was Nico?


14 March 2023

 



Lost souls-14.03.23

pulled  me

Lost souls bar and grill

Holding court 

like

Napoleon in exile

the

Vampyre

That

Bleeds  stones

My dead follow me

Cold comfort

you swim away

but

lost souls they call me


10 March 2023

 


jointing the dots-11.09.23

alone so long

Can’t remember when it happened

they  say

lost my special friend

And never been the same

Running till I feel off the edge

Tumbled down the rabbit hole

Spit me out 

underground

Don’t know

Way home

Angel

Says I hide

inside 

angel would fly

not voodoo

underground

visions ecstasy

absurdly dark pleasures


Jointing the dots


 Lighthouse-10.11.23

Moody pink spiders

the volatile mermaids

waiting in lighthouse


09 March 2023

 Spirit-06.03.23

silent offering

my sacrificial mermaid

spiritual sex


 real gone -06.03.23

absurdity awaits at every corner

Father figure

Lover

Alchemy

said too much

swims  away

Existentialism & guitar sounds


Gone 

Gone: no longer present; departed. 2)exhilarated state, through music, drugs, or love 3) something 

very good or quite desirable (sic Kerouac)

I am gone Mama

Real gone


 Fight night-09.05.23

her  fury intense

This is why  she won’t  see  you

Make -up sex so  good


05 March 2023

 Raw morning-28.02.23

give me words muse mine

give me  all your passions too

need to eat you raw


 Grace-03.03.23

orange marmalade sky

her heart beating  ferociously

under my palm 

hips moving rhythmically

under me

soft spring grass

the sunset

lemon  Kush

energy

life force 

passion

I am 

Giving in to sin

Take me !

She cries and kisses me

Giving us

Grace is favour, the free and undeserved help that God gives us.

grace




 She05.03.23

My blue-eyed whore

je t’adore

She the root Addiction

She is connexion to me

She is strange music

Taking her into me like

Heroin(mainlined in me soul)

She is

transmutation

Transforming

Dark matter powers the multiverse 

A blind goat bleats 

into

she

Because

She is

the mysteries of  space, time and women


Only she

Is blessed among women

She


27 February 2023

 Strange-27.02.23

lovers?

love?

swimming

a joke?

clouds

morph into you 

Dancing

Sexy

Cool

Strange: not previously visited, seen, or encountered; unfamiliar or alien. 2 very peculiar mama 3) us

Strange 


26 February 2023

 RSVP-26.02.23

fashionista

Last night

bare in harsh morning light

Close the curtains

insufferably bright

it’s no mystery

If you close your eyes and just remember

That this is what you wanted last night at gallery

you offered  yourself

whispers in the gallery

gestalt of passion

my little human sacrifice

Growling (lioness in heat)

Woman  catches afire

Vampyre

Feeding

Drinking deep 

Beauty

fire(one day will consume us)

Vampyres must be invited in, or they will lose powers.

you invited us  in

RSVP: répondez s'il vous plaît.

I just RSVP’d



15 February 2023

 Mask-15.02.23

She asks my name

Legion, for we are many

She dances

Blue bunny joins rose   clinched in teeth

lost in the music

lost in the moment

Lost in passions

She gives into sin

NO ETERNAL REWARD, WILL FORGIVE WASTING THE NIGHT

Says she lost her name

Spy pinatas hoover 


Mask:1)covering worn over the mouth and nose to reduce the transmission of infectious agents,2) a covering for all or part of the face, worn as a disguise, or to amuse , terrify or deceive  other people.

Think she lost her

Mask



 Tango-10.02.23

roses stole from a grave

I bring you

this is part of our dance( can’t remember when the music 

Do you want more?

We take 2 steps back

We take  1 forward

Ask your doctor if demonic possession

Is right for you

more than this

you  want to dance

blue bunny drops the needle

Tango: passionate, emotional form of dance in which the dancing couple hold each other closely 

Tango!




14 February 2023

 Tango-10.02.23

roses stole from a grave

I bring you

this is part of our dance( can’t remember when the music 

Do you want more?

We take 2 steps back

We take  1 forward

Ask your doctor if demonic possession

Is right for you

more than this

you  want to dance

blue bunny drops the needle

Tango: passionate, emotional form of dance in which the dancing couple hold each other closely 

Tango!




 Betwixt stations-14.01.23

coffee black

Steely coloured skies

gorilla glue (but nothing can keep us together)

Blue-grey smoke

sun arbitrarily bright (ray Charles blackout shades)

flee shadows

psychedelic music flows through in/ me 

absurd images

of you

0f me

Captured 

absurdly obscene

absurdly beautiful

absurdly Sensual embrace

Let you

reverberate

your smell

your taste

your feel

echoing

navigating blind

lost and found 

flashes of the destination

betwixt stations






 Monster-14.02.23

Monster searching  for redemption

In the darkness

Soft explosions

Looking inward

To see further out

Absurdity at every 

Corner

Underground

Fuck

it

Feels

Good to be a 

Monster

NO GODS

NO KINGS

ritual

muse

Stretched across the altar 

lost in abandon

sensual sacrifice

to

monstrous

 desire

Monster:  typically ugly, and frightening.

monster


09 February 2023

 Doll -09.02.23

you’re goanna

Fall

catch you in the vacuum

Of my gaze

After all

Fantasy made flesh

Musky scent 

Lust

Pieces of pain

Come on doll 

You can’t refuse

You‘ve got nothing to lose

  leper Messiah calls to you

Doll: 1. a small model or dummy of a human being, used as a toy. 2. slang. a pretty girl or woman: sometimes used as a term of endearment

doll


08 February 2023

 Steam-08.02.23

your  soul is on ice

come with me you'll catch afire

together  it's steam


07 February 2023

 flame-07.02.23


your fire was  keeping us

alive

so, I am chasing bunnies

Cooking up medicine

Chanting 

in the unity of the Holy Spirit, all glory and honour is yours, almighty Father, forever and ever

Reaching  for divinity

A flame

transfiguration

An F22 shoots down a balloon

Flame a hot glowing body of ignited gas that is generated by something on fire. 2)a lover 3) spark  of divinity

flame


31 January 2023

 


 Sick-01.02.23

Please  keep your cures

Love my symptoms and disease

i want to stay sick


29 January 2023

 Bedroom eyes-28.01.23

Blue bunny said

She would come

A big smile

Fire in eyes

Fire in her soul

I want play with fire

Lay with fire working  overtime on me

Seduction crime

Knocking me back

bedroom eyes (promise strange sin) 


Bedroom eyes: a lover who’s eyes that are extremely attractive, seductive  and 

Captivating

Diving in a vortex 

Of

thighs

 bedroom eyes





28 January 2023

 Zelda-28.01.23

Zelda Fitzgerald

reincarnated in mermaid

Zelda's  smiling face


27 January 2023

 Quiet-27.01.23

her silences speak

so very  evocative

thunderously loud


18 January 2023

 Morning fix-18.01.23

Muse notorious

her passions and legs famous

like heroin call me

16 January 2023

 Masochisms-15.01.23

Muse writhes and, moans

Walking a barb wire tightrope

making love to me


15 January 2023

 Betwixt stations-14.01.23

coffee black

Steely coloured skies

gorilla glue (but nothing can keep us together)

Blue-grey smoke

sun arbitrarily bright (ray Charles blackout shades)

flee shadows

psychedelic music flows through in/ me 

absurd images

of you

0f me

Captured 

absurdly obscene

absurdly beautiful

absurdly Sensual embrace

Let you

reverberate

your smell

your taste

your feel

echoing

navigating blind

lost and found 

flashes of the destination

betwixt stations






14 January 2023

 clouds and coffee-13.01.23

Be my purple wife

the Feral philosopher

needs body and lust


04 January 2023

Intervention 04.01.23

Your sobriety is beginning

To be a problem

Your dedication to reality

Your refusal to accept the absurdity

Your denial of desire

Fear of self

Your dependence on   maths and schedules

Are toxic 

We say this because we love you

And these behaviours 

Are harming you

And those around you 

intervention: an occasion on which a person with an addiction or other behavioural problem is confronted by a group of friends


this is an intervention






 

01 January 2023

Thristy-13.12.22

I am so thirsty

you’re sexy tall cool drink

I want to drink you

 

fire-01.01.23

Through muse the meaning

 

Through muse I get the message

shelter in her fire