Our father's-11.15

heavy smokers

hard drinkers

combat ribbons

Filthy gorgeous-1.11.19

Wild animal left in the cage for a long while then set free upon me

I will never step away from you

I don't know if this is forever

I don't know if this is for now

All I know 

you’re filthy

You’re gorgeous

Your halo is burning

it’s all saints Day 

Catholics honour all those who have entered heaven. ... All Saints' Day 2) el Día de los 

innnocentes” or the day of the children

Filthy gorgeous

I closer   to heaven

Sacred and profane-31.10.19

She’s all things sacred and profane

Sacred connected with God (or the gods

sacred beauty

I drink to innocence 

I drink to youth

youth that protects her

profane: not holy because unconsecrated, impure, or defiled 

I will

hold  her

when

 she learns the truth

I’ll find a vein

kill the pain

ritual 

sacred 

her dance

profane   

weapons-grade body

fertility rites

surrender

consecrated

Concsrated: to pronounce or make clean, or to dedicate something or someone completely, or to make holy.

Consecrated 

by  

profane 

by

 sacred

idiosyncratic dance-25.10.19

brightly coloured ink

contrasting

peaches and cream skin

She may have been a  product of Collective unconscious

Collective unconscious: the unconscious that part of the mind  memories and impulses common to all mankind

some strange Angel 

pulling me in

my heroine

pulling me in 

like heroin 

Idiosyncratic: a strange or unusual habit, way of behaving, or feature

strange Angel

demonic  vampyre

pulling into

with some strange music 

pulling me in

idiosyncratic dance

revulsion-15.10.19

a call, coffee

you start unpacking all your luggage

for me to carry

not that I am worthy

you explain

detail

medicate

AWAY

demon’s personality?

 hear the

the things

you say

they don’t make sense

not seeing evidence

double-edged stiletto

and a dime bag

betwixt worlds

love lost

revulsion

fills the

space

Give me

valise chuffed

with sorrow and regret

Revulsion: a sense of disgust and loathing

I’ll take

your revulsion

too

bitter truths better

than

sweet lies

revulsion

Wahala 16.01.18-later

I went to sleep to 

your thousand and one  sorrows

awoke  to your troubles

some begged 

some borrowed

some stolen

cured your disease 

perfected my  disease

kept each other secret

you said 

you were  a tattoo 

Tarroo: 1 : a mark, figure, design, or word intentionally fixed or placed  2) a mark on soul akin to a scar

on me soul

no

scabs on me arm

I passed you 

tonight 

at the hotel

where they celebrated you

SO pretty

SO talented

best lay in the city

went to the bar

you were right 

tattoo

Wahala

WAHALA: trouble, annoyance and headache, all rolled into one2) a bit of hart break even though you know better

that man-09.10.19

cowgirl

blames

like all the others

The Others: Men who used her and treated her badly

banality of evil

Banality of evil: Hannah Arendt writhing about Adolf Eichmann

personified

betray her?

because

I could

because

she said I would

because

cowgirls can’t live underground

because

mermaids exist

because

I am that man

I told you not to trust me-07.10.19

losing me

waking in an episode of the prisoner

waking in an episode of the prisoner

The Prisoner is a 1967 British sci—fi ’67-‘68allegorical television series about an unidentified British intelligence agent who is abducted and imprisoned 

in the time of my banishment

3 beer circus

by

General Tom Thumb

General Tom Thumb: a dwarf who rose to fame as a circus performer

leper

Leper: a person suffering from leprosy2))a person who is avoided or rejected by others for moral or social reasons 3) a state of being

flawed

tragically 

absurdly

telling   YOU the truth

don’t trust me

choose me-20.09.19

you’re

dressed to kill

you’re

not protected

this adventure

 Choose your adventure 

Choose Your Own Adventure, is a series of children's game books 2) the choices 

that defines us.

I choose

pink spider in cherry flavored  cyanide lip-gloss

morphine nods

coke binges

deep underground submerged in art and music

eschewing the surface forever

existing in shadows, night and myth

Outside of control

choose   your adventure

choose me

passion

depravity

the absurdity of being

a blue dog 

choose your adventure

Her movie-17.09.19   

Just a bit player

Here

I am  am super villain

A

Main character

main character :character who has a major purpose or role in the plot and/or interacts regularly with main characters.

crucial to the plot not ancillary

FLAWED

tragically?

Tragically flawed:a trait in a character leading to his downfall

intenently?

strategically?

I’ll write  a new script.

dream-16.09.19

Red Queen: he Red Queen: antagonist in the story as she is the queen for the side opposing Alice

Red Queen wants

to know

what no one can

what the Mad Hatter is?

did he love Alice?

did the Queen of Hearts love him?

he love her?

Queen of Hearts who is quick to give death sentence

I just smile

this a dream

they will

forget me

the red  queen

already  has forgotten

Mad Hatter knew

Mad Hatter:  is a seemingly insane gives out riddles and dresses fashionably. 2) He is part of the resistance to bring down the Red Queen's command of Underland(underground) and thus end her bloody rule

It’s all just a dream

St Dymphna -13.09.19

Found my consciousness in a glassine envelope

my soul in blood roses

dancing   in a syringe

Glassine envelope:The preferred packaging envelope for dime bags, also popular with stamp collectors.

shot it into me neck

Rushing: euphoria  when skag reaches the skag centre of your brain/soul.

rushing   riding that white horse

down  from the polar peaks

down te rabbit hole

straight underground

still dropping fast

9th circle

straight to the 9th circle :The Ninth Circle of Hell is a frozen lake 2)the Ninth Circle are people who have betrayed the trust of someone or something close and special.

there 

I will

find her

St Dymphna  tipped me off as she was getting dressed  by the light of a flashing neon light

shouting Vacancy

StDymphna: is the patron saint of the nervous, emotionally disturbed, mentally ill. She was a mystic and had Stigmata

when I find her

I will leave 

there

St Dympna  calls

wounds  

madness 

dance

synchronistically 

Got to 03.09.19

got to take it while it’s hot

she’s a kinky little thing

Got a walk before you run

She’s got a taste

got to love her while it lasts

living fast

Got to take it and run

mannequins riot demanding gentilia 

She ‘s a magazine dream

got to open her up

Got to pull the subscription card from her navel

got to use your teeth

Van Gough’s ear on a key fob

got to live

got to love

mimes scream bomb threats the silence is a roar

Got to feel the angry eyes

Got to be the one who never stays watching

Libretto of desire contain few words, many growls and moans

Libretto: text of an opera or other vocal work.

got to sing

got to scream

got to make love

got to run before the sun

got to see this play out

31.07.17-cherry cyanide-later
Cherry comes
long spindly legs and arms
close around
me
pink spiders
get me
dying  and living reconciled
she follows
underground
far
from
hallowed ground
Hallowed : consider sacred

purity a stranger
to begin
dark
sacraments
my little
human sacrifice
beauty carries
karmic debt
Karmic: Hinduism Buddhism the principle of retributive justice

I ‘m
penance
kisses me
I
savour
the intensity
and
recognise
flavour
cherry cyanide
Cynaide: sodium or potassium cyanide used as a poison

should have known-04.08.19
should have known
brown shirts
Cheetos jesus
coming
Werewolf: Nazi plan, which began development in 1944, to create a resistance force
werewolf’s rising
Nazis
shooting us
should  have known
Can’t run
can’t hide
should have known
it was always
us
or
them

3 children are now orphans after parents killed in El Paso shooting cbs.com
orphans covered in mothers’ blood
should have known
we were always on our own
should have known
I would have to kill

see you-29.07.19
miss
you
horse  born in surf runs
see
you
today
tomorrow
Physical Plane: physical universe, in emanationist metaphysics refers to the visible reality of space and time, energy and matter
see
you

beyond
physical plane
see
you
beyond good and evil
why  are we born screaming
pray screaming
only to
die quietly
see
you
as
you are
see you
as
you where
see you
as
you will be
See  You: way of saying goodbye to someone when you expect to meet them again soon 2) To see definitely another person in the future but no specific date,time and place yet agreed upon. 3) observe someone
see  you

Apollo 11-20,07.19

Little black dress

Blood red lips her tongue circles

Ignition on

her hips keeping the rhythm

Engines on

5

lost in music

4

legs so long

3

take her hand

2

puling her close

1

she motions to the door

We have lift-off

my place

all engines running

I’ll drive

We  cleared the tower

God Speed!

becoming god-1807.19

LOCK AND LOAD

if it  moves

legal target

if it doesn’t move

legal target

we can’t become

god by creating life

we must become 

god

by taking life

door opens opens

into the night sky

mission

become

GOD

Adagio-17.07.19

die

for you

easy done a dozen times

demon

dies 

kills

trying

to

live

for you

Oh, God, give me

 reason to live.

freezing

Freezing: be turned into ice or another solid as a result of extreme cold. 2) treat (someone) with a cold manner

. Come and love me

like you  promised

slow death

don’t shut me out

slowly

Set me free.

Set me free.

need

Rock n’roll

Adagio: 1)Performed with a slow tempo or pace 2)In music, a direction to play at a slow 

tempo

death

via

adagio

misery-10.07.19

Misery: a state full of pain, suffering and usually confusion. unable to take back words. sigh. not necessarily physical or emotional or spiritual. but usually all three 2) a kind of existence

don’t trust happy

Happy: feeling or showing pleasure or contentment 2) fictional state of being

don’t know what it is

LOVE

an

amputation 

NEED

a sacred fix

Fix: ) To temporarily satisfy an addiction. 2) to repair something that is broken.

want a holy fuck

Holy: edicated or consecrated to God or a religious purpose; sacred 2) a thing created by lovers

come to  me

oh fuck!

I  feel!

YOU

oh fuck!

I ge!

YOU

oh fuck !

I love

YOU

torment

torture 

pain

YOU

misery